· sweet εїз children ·

It's that time of the year again.

 

I'm not sure if it's a good thing, but recent events have just almost all pointed to me being this stoic/stouthearted/stern/strong iron-maiden like figure. Well I'm OK with being a judgmental pragmatist. I'm clearly not very good at tolerating those who can't quickly make decisions, see things straight, or deal with their "feelings" and "issues"; yet I thought I already intentionally lower my expectations for most people...

 

So the end result is I'm a little scared that I'm turning into (or at least being perceived as) one of those no-nonsense, fakely well-mannered "older" women in a fashionable power dress with their lips permanently curled in a semi-friendly smile while a little frown sits on their forehead saying they've seen many things and they've just seen through you and weighed you up and down. It doesn't mean they can't be nice people......

 

Anyway, I'm a month late for LP's new album, Minutes to Midnight. Listening to it was like seeing an ex from years back changed his job, put on some weight but is doing alright. You're somewhat embarassed by the memories brought back by the accidental reunion, but couldn't help finding out more about what he's been up to.

 

Mike Shinoda is turning 30 this year. I guess he's done some pretty solid stuff for someone of that age. Then again 30 isn't that young, when I think about it that's just a bit over 10 years ahead for me. Fuck only 10 years!! I'll have to do all the corporate climbing family building money laundering reproducing etc human stuff in the meantime. Humans live such short lives. Short, insignificant lives. No matter what happens to you the world will just keep spinning...which isn't that bad; but then it's not just you; you know Big Brother will still be on TV tomorrow even if you drop a nuke in the middle east tonight (then again even if the nuke is dropped inside the house the show will still be pretty much the same).

 

Had intense talk with mum about the recent Chinese stock market crash. She had some self-defensive denial issues. Then had to go on a hectic last minute library trip through the deadly quagmire that is St John's Oval for an Investments book. The irony. So at the end of the day I deserved that hour's break watching the SBS documentary on Indira Gandhi. Don't you just love political assassinations? The possibilities...

 

Well if one day I start my own cult of personality and become a "people's dictator", I will also be indifferent about dying in my bed or dying standing up. I guess it's not that bad being the no-nonsense well-mannered "mature" woman. It's not that bad if a few people are mildly afraid of you. In fact a reign of terror sounds pretty damn good to me... We all know what happens to dictators, however charismatic they are. But I will borrow LP's lyrics here: "the only thing that's worse than one is none".

- GNARLS BARKLEY.

 

- 300.

 

- Red wine masks.

 

- Hoping for the job at Marie Stopes.

 

- Capital allocation of assets and optimal portfolio selection.

 

- Skipping dinner.

 

- Julian's baby photos.

 

- Eunuch porn.

 

- Fantasising about the blonde hair dye and bellybutton ring in 12 months.

 

- Scottish Fold and Manx.

 

- Decorating my room with a red and purple theme.

 

- Cheesecake and papaya.

Despite my possibly eternal affection for my high school group of friends, my time in high school had been filled with private unhappiness, and to some extent 1st year uni had also been obscure.

 

I guess that is the price one must pay for escaping the education system for 2 years by skipping ahead gayly--I just wasn't "old" enough to understand so many things.

 

Jackson my beloved student has successfully graduated from high school. On his blog I read the numerous tributes that go out to all his friends. I've never grown up with a particular group of friends. Apart from maybe one or two, most of my current friends would never be able to say "I remember what cat did in year 7..." 

 

I guess that is the price one must pay for moving around so much--it makes you grow up faster, but like all drugs that speed things up there are side effects.

 

But this year it had all been different. It has been the year of many "firsts"--most of them caused by the fact (previously unknown to me) that I've always lived a versatile but sheltered life. By chance I moved into Darlington House, and by chance it has made 2006 the year with most happy days. When living independently is mixed with having to bond with strangers, friendship was not the first on my wish list; yet the art of making "different" friends and reflecting upon oneself during the process was to become the greatest personal development I achieved this year. You just know there are so much more to a friendship when arguing about who hasn't done the dishes in the sink, making fruitfly traps together, doing each other's face and talking about life and death culture and conflict family and lovers day and night drunk and sober.

 

Every unit has a unique dynamic derived from various personalities. Combined, Darlington House also has a unique dynamic that is sometimes subtle and sometimes dramatic, but always, always, down to earth. Its humour and wisdom are embedded in daily routines, protecting us yet pushing us out into the real world.

 

From the over-the-top, introverted, pretentious, frank, cool, intelligent, lazy, silly, odd, psychopathic, multicultural individuals residing at Darlington House, what I've learnt was not only binge drinking, but also new understandings of money, family, confidence, materialism, body image, sportsmanship, relationship and friendship. Each person tells a different story and through their harmony and conflicts they weave a picture of the reality--which can be so divorced from the homogenous compound of those in the legal profession--the variety that is the true Australian identity.

 

Like most people, I will be moving on from Darlington House. But a small part (or small parts) of me will always be with it--oh you know what I'm talkin about. Thank you and gluck Harry, Brice, Tess, Emma, Big Andrew, Janelle, Kwan-san, Bronnie, Punit, Hazel, Rhys, Myriam, Ben, Angy, Dennis, Johnno, Chris, Aaron, Nick, Lucy, Eileen, Helen, Amy C, Tim, Luke, Andrew, Julian, Ankit, Kate, Katerina, Ash, Sal, Martha, Han, Julia, Tom, Rob, Josh, Harry No.1, Evan, Grace, Rihannon and Amy F: I owe you all a year of fantastic memories and hard as it is to believe, I love you all in different ways.

 

 

Julia, am I melodramatic enough for your taste this time around?

SMART JUICE, Sara Lee apple & raspberry pie, dancing to the most relaxing and beautiful love sounds!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sweet sweet taste of endorphin leaves all your worries behind~

(self) Love is what makes one natural high s2